Cigarettes and Butterfly's

"We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty." -Maya Angelou

I hit a little patch of, let's say, temporary mini depression.

You see, while only doing things that fit my "life purpose" is all well and good. It has left A LOT room and empty space for change. And it is hard, a little sad and lonely here right now.

The time that used to be spent being off purpose, wasting time, mindlessly watching re-runs on TV, hanging out with the people I talked about the other day, or running here for this one and doing that for that one is now free.

Don't get me wrong, it is great. Now, I focus on the things I need and want to spend time doing to remain"on purpose."

I am FAR MORE productive. I have accomplished more this week than I have in a week in a very long time.

I have felt much more in-control, focused and organized.

I even had free time to actually sit relax and have coffee and breakfast with my bestie.

I guess it is just, old habits are hard to break. Let me compare it smoking. If you have ever been a smoker, or are one now, you will know exactly what I am talking about.

Smoking is bad for you. there is nothing good about it! It is literally slowly destroying you. THIS IS A FACT! Even as you are smoking that cigarette, enjoying it, in the back of your mind you know this is not good and completely self destructive

HOWEVER, you just don't stop, as a matter of fact, you start spending more and more time with Philip (Philip Morris that is) all the while knowing that it is one of the most ridiculous and stupid things you could be doing.

Then one day, God willing, before it is to late. You realize this has to end. And you stop and cut smoking out of you life. Some do it could turkey, some do it slowly, some keep Philip around and let him spend time with them only a few times a year. Either way, Suddenly you miss it. you are sad, feel off balance and are a little depressed.

Well, that is where I have been. I have been missing my old habits and the never realized how much time they filled.

Growth, it isn't always easy, but the payoff is worth it.

Ask the butterfly.

:0)

AA